Friday, April 30, 2010

ily, Dad

Just to share a song I came across a song book during keyboard lesson. Love the lyrics.



More Than I Imagine


How are you doing?

I am doing great here. Life's been busy when March kicked in and got even busier as April falls. However, there were greattt, exciting moments, L-O-L moments, not-so-pretty moments, and of course stress moments.

Still, praise God soo much that He's in control of my life and schedule. So often, I drift away from Him. But His everlasting love never fails to find me. These happens when He allows me to go down through unwanted situations, and that is when I cry out, "God, I can't do this on my own anymore!" That's when He gently picks me up, holds my hand and continues back the journey-leading me on. Sometimes, we're like that, aren't we? Boasting when we're all strong and mighty thinking we can do it all by myself, only to forget and then remember that it is GOD WHO MADE US STRONG!

I have so much to share. One of them is my experience of God singing to me during worship. That happened just a few weeks ago on a Sunday morning. While worshipping in church during the song "You Are More Than I Imagine"... As I was singing to God and trying to mean what I was singing...

You are more than I imagine,
Greater than the heavens,
Deeper than my heart could ever dream,
You are more than any treasure,
Beyond what I could measure,
Everything that I could ever dream,
More than enough for me.

All of a sudden, God spoke in my heart, "let me sing this to you." So, I allowed God to. Listening to the worship team and the congregations sing as God sings through them, half way, I stopped. "This is crazy!! How can this be? GOD, G-O-D is singing to me?! I was trying to pull myself back. I'm the one who's supposed to worship God, not Him singing to me. This is so wrong!"

So, I continued back worshipping God. Then, God spoke to me again. "Let me sing to you." I stopped and remembered the verse:
Zephaniah 3:17(NIV) "The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing."

So this time, knowing it is God who wants to sing to me, I gladly allowed Him to. And it touches my heart hearing Him singing these.. the SAME THING I sang, back at me:

You are more than I imagine,
Greater than the heavens,
Deeper than my heart could ever dream,
You are more than any treasure,
Beyond what I could measure,
Everything that I could ever dream,
More than enough for me.

I am more than God imagines. I am greater than the humungous heaven that He created. His love and thoughts of me are deeper than His heart could ever dream. He says I am more than any treasure, beyond what He could measure, I AM everything He could ever dream... I am more than enough for Him.

That is what I call Father's love. Sometimes, our earthly dad will fail us in certain ways and sometimes we think, they couldn't measure up to our expectations as dads, but bear in mind... We have a heavenly Father who adores us. Who rejoices over us. And even sings over us passionately. Jesus loves you and I so deeply; more than our hearts can imagine.

Rejoicing in His greeaatt <3,

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Wisdom is what I desire


How was your CNY? Hope you had a great time reuniting with your long lost family! I had a great CNY minus some stuffs that happened on the first day. My grandma couldn't get up from the bed in the evening after falling down. So we had to call for a doctor to come over and to give her an injection. But thank God she is fine now. phew~

First day of CNY: As pastor said, church first, then celebrations. Worship led that morning. Scared for the past few days as I have not chose my songs one day before practice. That week was just so packed! Mental block for list of songs too. =p But thank God for everything- for being my strength; for just being there to cheer me on; for believing in me even when I doubt my own ability. His grace is always sufficient, never lacking. Also, thank God for Pastor, Aty Jackie, Aunty Priscilla, Aunty Cindy and Uncle Charlie who played and sing on that day. Went aunt's house for lunch; grandma's house for dinner. Seeing grandma suffering on that night- horrible. Collected $$ of course ;)

Second day: Dad's friends came over. And more of dad's friends. Followed by relatives. Dinner at grandma's house again! Cool! haha!

Third day: Shopping with friends cancelled. Get well soon, babe! SO bloggin'. =)

CNY week (14-19 Feb) is relaxing for me. No classes on Monday, Thurs and Fri, no piano lessons on Tues, no music practice for youth on Thurs night, no keyboard class on Thurs afternoon etc... Hence, I get to catch some movies- Percy Jackson and the lightning thief (a show that confused me enough on truth and placed fear. :S.. but still! I enjoyed hanging out with my cool youth friends =)) and a few movies on 411, 413. I don't know when I'm able to do so and relax again! Definitely going to enjoy my week! Absolutely!

Nevertheless, there's still many things to do that needs time, discipline and effort. I need to buck up on my keyboard skills, listen to the instrumental parts of the song and learn. Guess this is the best way to learn. Piano pieces and scales... Accountings- assignments and study! Marketing Principles- presentation on Monday; revision on chapters. The items may be few, but the time needed is huge!

I need to cut down time on the Net. Though not alot, but still..... sigh. It's amazing how I can surf the Net just going where I feel like dropping by on those webpages. Aarghhh.

Psalm 90:12(A) So teach us to number our days, that we may get a heart of wisdom.

Dear God,

Please show me how short my life really is, so that I may use my time wisely to do things that are important instead of doing things that are not beneficial. Grant me a heart of wisdom.

You know my name

Monday, January 25, 2010

40 Days is over; but there's more to come! whee!

If you've been reading my previous posts, I've once blogged about a book- Give Me 40 Days. Here's the link: Well, today (25th January 2010) in history, is the day I've completed my 40 Days. *clap*

Well actually I took 56 Days to complete my 40 days. What happened? Tiredness and hecticness was the main reasons, laziness and procrastination had their equal shares as well. haha

But all in all, it's a great journey. I say it again, great journey. Though there were times when it's hard to persevere and thought of quitting comes occasionally especially when you feel like giving up, but still I chose not to give up.

One thing God spoke to Freeda before she wrote this book was "Would you give me 40 days?" Well, to me, God told and reminded me time again that"Time is in His hands." So everytime when I am just so pressed for time, God reminds me- "Time is in God's hands." I remembered God once asked me on one of the morning of my finals, "Can you give me 20 minutes?" Yes, 20. =) In that 20 minutes, I willingly laid aside my textbooks, notes etc and just read the 40 Days book, pray and probably even sing a song of praise. It was so refreshing and I feel not anxious whether I am all prepared for my exams or not coz I know in the end of the day, it is not my exam results that holds my future, it is my God who holds my very future.

There's just so much I've learnt- commit to God and He will direct your path, surrendering your expectations to God, watch what you speak as it can either bring life or death, getting your motives right with God and of course, the importance of prayer. I've also grown to be much more sensitive to God, definitely.

I can't write my whole experience here which I can't exactly remember all, but if you are keen in having a close walk and relationship with Jesus, then I recommend this book to you. It changed my life and my heart deep inside. Give God a chance to mould your heart. He re-shaped those part of my heart that was out of shape, though there are still so many areas that needs to be shaped! Not only that, your eyes will be open to look out for the needs of others.

Chase God, pursue God, seek God. And all things shall be added unto you.

*p/s: If you want to do this 40 days, I strongly advice you to pray for covering over yourself, family and close friends. satan is going to do his work in bringing you down as well. just look at my posts from 1st Dec till 25th Jan. Actually, my posts are just a lil of what I went through. But do not fear, if God is for us who can be against us? =D


Hold on to your dreams

I've digged up some old yet very precious treasures, in the midst of clearing my very messy room. Those pictures used to be oh-so-dear to me!

A friend of mine wanted to borrow a Vince's album which I digged through my drawer only to find that I do not own that particular album. Nevertheless, I've found some old precious photos. I shall let the pictures speak.

I think this was my first time meeting Vince in person. My dad went all the to The Mines from PJ okay to drop me and my mum! Now thinking, my parents were crazy! Lol.. Nah, they just loved me so much, don't they, to 'obey' (give in to) my desires? No wonder, I love them too. =p

How this picture was my favourite. Vince's motto- "Hold On To Your Dreams."

He was more than an artiste to me. He inspires and encourages me through his beliefs, godliness and character. A man who never fails to give praise to God whenever he wins an award- big or small! I guess these are the few main reasons why I used to be 'crazy' =)

K moving on.. I found some memories that brings back my highschool fond memories. Here's two of them. Cocuriculum was one of the things that kept me very busy throughout my highschool years. LEO Club, Chess, Rangers, CU.... you name it. But it's good because I've been
'trained' to be involved and active in many things. Juggling things.

Oops, This Is Our God Album background behind my pictures. Love it though.


Saturday, January 23, 2010

Life is unpredictable, but I enjoyed every single learning moment with You


I don't know if I can take this any further. From one testing to another testing and the list goes on; I don't know when is it going to end. I now understand what Job went through- from one testing to another. I feel I could relate to Job. Lord, how ironic is it that I could not find some one that I'm close with to relate to, but instead Job who lived long ago is whom I can relate to. Lol.. And yes, Lord, I know what I'm going through is probably even nothing compared to Job who lost his wife, his friends sneered at him, endured all kinds of afflctions brought by the devil.. He's so tough and strong in You.

No matter what the devil can throw at me, my faith in You remains strong. When I asked you why am I going through these and how long more... "You said You are enlarging my capacity to contain more of You." But when I pray that it will end faster, You ain't happy... I can see that what's coming in the months to come- the new responsibilties, new journey, new leading, new challenges and adventures. You are really changing and moulding my heart. Ever since January started, You are so concern that you would not even let a minute go to waste in doing what You can to teach. THERE'S SO MUCH YOU'RE ARE DOING!

Well the downside, my friends will keep thinking that I'm emo, heartsick, heart broken, stress and whatever reasons I can think of whenever they see me cry. Uh it''s embarrassing especially when they see me, someone older than them cry.. Really lose 'face' lah. But nevertheless, I have never let it stop me from allowing You to speak to me, convict me, love me, hear what You have to say or feel or even what You are doing. It's crazyyy yet amazinggg, for reasons!

Weell, Your will be done in my life. All I ever ask of is that You don't leave me. I can't live life without You. My life will never be the same O Lord. My greatest asset is You, God.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Your Love In The Desert...

Hey there!

If you're going through tough times when life seems to get out of control; when you don't know which road to take; when you're unsure if God is with you in your hardest time, I pray this song will encourage your soul just as it had done to mine when I penned it down. All glory to God! Though yes, I wished I need not go through all these which to me are unnessary, but I trust that every single thing that happens in my life is for good in the end. (In addition to all, today, both my eyes are swollen! How am I going to go out and youth tmr?? How am I going to go for practice, and back up sing?

My cry is Psalm 22:11 & 8-"Do not be far from me, for trouble is near and there is no one to help."He trusts in the Lord; let the LORD rescue him. Let him deliver him, since he delights in him." You made me trust in You!

Guess He knows what's happening and allows it to happen, for a reason. Praise God that though my circumstances may be big, but God is wayyyy BIGGERRR!!!

Would I find Your love in the desert?
Would I find Your peace in the midst of the storm?
Would I find Your light when I have lost my way?
Would I find Your strength when weakness comes?
Oh how near You are,
That Your arms surrounding me
Oh how Your love,
That is so, so, so strong!
Mighty God,
I find my strength in You
Oh Prince of Peace
It's You who calm my storm
Everlasting Father
Your grace will see me through
And yes, for sure
I'll find Your love in the desert

Thursday, January 21, 2010

My passion- God

Time flies so fast! It's the 21st already. January has been exciting because God never fails to surprise me with the things He could do, tiring for so many different reasons every day, lovely for the doors He has open for me, unlovely when yucky things happen such as getting sick.

Anyway, I thought of doing a January wrap-up post but I don't think I can. It'll take forever literally.

So here it begins. =)

1. Do you know the status update we type on facecbook is so powerful? Guess you won't know coz it made me fall sick. Because of this sentence- "Rescue me from the boat of complacency." I couldn't believe it that I fell sick and still am after 1 week because of that one sentence! Well, the reason this happen is not because of a status update but a real heart's cry to not stay in the comfort zone where all is so nice and comfy (which I tend to like)... And now what the Bible says that the devil is prowling around like a lion looking for someone to devour. Guess he found me... To summarize it, yes it affected my life- falling sick is not nicee ok?, my mood etc.. But God allowed this to happen to teach me that though I'm in the midst of my own problems, God taught me to look at other people's needs and pray for them. And of course, to always be alert and pray.

2. God has opened a new door for me for my future career. I failed my Grade 8 piano's practical last year. Hence, I have to re-sit. But it does not stop there. God has turned my failure into a blessing in disguise. Because I failed, I had to look for another teacher coz my current teacher just gave birth and her schedule is so pack according to her. I trusted God that He knows which is the right one for me coz He's the one that reminded me; surely He has a plan for me. Anyway, I called my ex-piano teacher who owns the piano school to ask if she could accept me as a student again (quite embarrassing honestly). I quitted that piano school in 2005 because of PMR. My ex piano teacher told me years ago that she will hire me when I finish my Grade 8. I never thought of this to happen coz I quitted last time. But God brought me back to her. Right at Grade 8 (re-sit). God certainly has His own sense of humor. HIs timing is always, always James Bond's timing. chun~! I'm planning to work coz I have to pay off my education loan on my own (parents MIGHT help in the future) and I plan to work as a tuition teacher or/and a piano teacher as side income even before I graduate, only if it's God's will. =))

I've always, always wanted to work, but God never allowed me to work. Once when I asked Him can I work, He gave me an answer which is, "You have no time."- which was true. Other times, no peace in my heart. Last semester precisely, I thought I could look for a job for 2 weeks and I won't have problems going there coz my brother works at Pyramid. I thought God allowed me. Off I brushed my teeth. All of a sudden, my eyes began to itch. I just touched (haven't even rub) and it became red. Sigh.. So I know it's not God's will for me to work yet. Those jobs at Pyramid pays RM5 per hour. Poor brother honestly. And God reminded me, you cannot serve both God and money. conviction. ouch.

Deep down I've always know that God has a different plan for my life, somehow. He directs my path. I know God always wants to bless me and every child of His abundantly, only if we will obey His voice. I've always remembered what my friend Jessica shared in LYPG. Being obedient to God means when God says you run, you run.. When He says you stop, you stop. When He says you eat, you eat. You fast, you fast.

You can never buy God's voice with money. To me, hearing God's voice is sooo precious. Hearing (and feeling) what's in His heart- the pain, the joy is invaluable. No matter how rich you are, you can never buy God's precious voice. God taught me to listen to His voice, to always check in tune with Him. Hear His directions, His will. This is what I call EXCITINGGGG!!!!! Maybe this is what keeps me passionate about till this day. Though I have to clearly say, hearing God's voice is not only for me. And it does not suddenly happen. The more you desire to hear from God, spend time with Him, love Him with all your heart, you will definitely experience them.

Till then, cheers!

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

I. Stand. In. Awe.

I was just looking back at the pictures that I have in facebook. And as I kept looking from one picture to another, my heart just stood amazed. So amazed at the hands of God, His faithfulness and His presence in my life. Beginning of last year 2009, I recalled God gave me an impression while praying. I saw a balloon that just kept expanding and expanding that it grew very very big; bigger than my whole self! And God gave me a forward 'notice' that He is going to expand me, stretched me. Throughout the year, He spoke to me reminding me to not fear, but step out and I will soar. I didn't realized He expanded me more than I knew of probably coz there's so many things that just kept happening, that I didn't had much time to reflect. All I know was there's something challenging as each month or even weeks passed by!

Worship leading for church's main service was probably one of the craziest thing I've ever said yes to last year. I cried for hours negotiating with God with every reasons like I can't sing so well etc. But in the end, I know God has a plan. A plan I do not know. I am fearful, I admit when it comes to worship leading. But through it all, as I've grown from strength to strength and from church service to service, I've seen how God used people who are available and willing to trust Him when He calls. God will never call us to do something which we cannot do.

Moving on, this year has been a very special year to me as God started putting a passion or desire to pray for Malaysia. It all happened one day when I asked God what He would like me to pray. And I started praying for Malaysia. Tears rolled down my eyes as I felt God's heart, and thus I know that the nation is where the heart of God lies. Not that God cares more about the nation more than us, but God has such great plans for every country, including Malaysia. I started attending Local Youth Prayer Gathering (LYPG) on Saturdays. *Please check out the LYPG video on the side of my blog! And come? =))*

Oh how I remember after a few times attending, I wanted to stop going. But the night before LYPG, God said He wanted me to go. And how much struggles I had in finding transportation. I often asked my mum but she's busy on Sat. My dad does not like to be involved in Christian activities as he's not a Christian. So, I went to sleep telling God, that it's not that I don't want to go now, but I've no transport. The next morning as soon as I just opened my eyes, God immediately spoke to me to go. I was confused and scared but all I know is when God says go, I really need to go, no matter what. He'll surely provide the way. True enough, Holy Spirit asked me to ask my dad and surprisingly my dad agreed to take me. The following week, the same scenario of God asking me to attend on Friday night, but mum said no coz she needs to do marketing, the next morning God spoke to go again. And on that day, my dad will be passing by Kelana Jaya around that hour to go to Sri Damansara (if I'm right). So from that onwards, I knew God wanted me to join LYPG. Not only that, God provided a way for me to go- dad (most of the time) or mum(depending). No matter what I'll be there. And it was a start to a journey of searching my heart's motive, catching and feeling God's heartbeat, feeling God's heartpain, listening for His voice and direction, conviction of our sins and loving God more and more. It has certainly been one of the major highlights in my life. Attended MYPG 3 @ Alor Setar, hearing God speak to me again through Richard Rajoo, Yoshua etc. Not forgetting ThePlan09! Can't wait to see a lasting youth missions movement taking place in Malaysia, seeing youths catching the fire to be God's armies. A year God arranged for me to cross-pathed with passionate Christian youths especially. Exciting, exciting! With a vision that is so great.

Studies wise, all I can say is praise God! A GPA of 3.5 and above for all my 3 semesters in this 2009 is definitely God's favor, mercy and faithfulness. Oh how many times I thought I wouldn't have made it. 2010 results?? Gotta put in more effort though and God will see me through again, confidently.

Serving God in youth, church and CF has been increasing more and more. CF Camp, SEGi Revolution P.A.R.T.Y and WiFi youth camp, worship teams etc... Not forgetting the opportunity to be part of the worship team for Global Day Of Prayer 2009 again and ThePlan09. God has always believed in me, even when I doubt myself. He's a cool, super cool God! <33

Relationships.. I think I hardly touch on this in my blog. lol.. Well, I'm glad I wasn't into any relationship this year, otherwise I would have missed out on the many great things He has for me this year. Am still waiting (for "David- a man after God's own heart").. with a deep confidence that God has the best for me. =) And my focus should (will) always be serving God first. My verse(I mean God's verse): Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all other things shall be added unto you. Help me to wait patiently for the awesomest guy You have for me, Father God. Amen! =))

All in all, I'm humbled. So humbled that God would want to use an ordinary girl who doesn't have much to offer in terms of talent, resources like me. But I began to learnt that God is not scouting for talents and all, He's looking for an individual that is always available for God to use any time, any moment. God really does look at our heart, more than any other!

Will 2010 be another busy year for me? What has God put in my heart for this 2010? 2010 will be 3Bs- Better, Bigger, and Brighter. I pondered and questioned, was 2009 not so bright for me, that 2010 will be brighter? lol.. As I think back, yeah, that there were times when things or incidents that happened that weren't so bright. But whatever it is, I believe that God has a purpose for everything that happens in and throughout my life.

This year's theme for my life is to be a light and perfume for Him, carrying His presence wherever I go, that I might bring others to know Him. (which I realized was aligned to my church theme this year: The Church in Many Places; not jsut in church but wherever we are. We are the Church itself!) And a few watchouts- not to let $$ to cause me from slowing down in serving God. sigh.. And to remember God does not just look at my 'righteousness'.

Much ahead for 2010! God bless each of you who reads my posts! Cheers!

Ohana means family. family means... nobody gets left behind or forgotten =)

People often ask me what I have been busy about..
Well, my Intercultural Dance performance and booth set up was one of th many. Below is my group's dance performance which we've been practising almost every day for the month of late Oct, Nov and Dec last year. Do check it out if you'd like to. The one at the sidebar can only be viewed half. So yeah. Praise God for the pretty good responses we've received! Halleluyah!

Groupie! From left: Christine, farah, Sharmisttha, Melissa, Staci, Reynolds

Working as a group is not easy. There were good times, conflicts etc but I thank God coz He has placed each of us there as a group for a purpose. I began to see the strengths and also the weaknesses of each of us.

Christine- She's a brave girl. She'll get whatever she wants and whatever she needs, in her own ways though. She knows how to use whatever she has to attain it. She is a good dancer and a real good choreographer. Cheerleading, dancing is her thing.

We got a sponsorship from Sunway Group for our costume, thanks to Christine. =)
Background pic was Sunway Lagoon, trying out our costumes.

Staci- She's creative, full of ideas and thinks thoroughly before carrying out something. A very busy girl who is in charged of the college's UIU's Fayette House. A brilliant girl who carries herself well in socializing with people.

This is one of the many creative ideas of Staci's. Credits to Staci.

Reynolds- Well, also another brain in this group. He reads alot and is knowledgeable. Thus, he got the responsibility to read a book on the Portuguese Settlement for one of our presentations and summarize it for us. He is always ready to contribute whatever is needed for this group. He carried packets of ice on the day of the booth and performance by BUS ALONE!

Farah- Fuh.. A natural dancer. No dance classes or any background in dancing, and she dances really well. Like really, really well! Though she often has transportation problems in coming for practices, nevertheless, she danced well on that day. Proud of her!

Sharmisttha- Gorgeous is one word to describe her. haha. The kids you see in the video/pics are her cute tiny lil cousins. The flowers you see at our booth are borrowed from her mother. She's also one who's like a natural dancer. She shakes her hips really well, so pro. Don't believe, look at the video. (orange shirt!)

Melissa- Yours truly.. Not for me to say. =)

I want to thank Cheng fee Vien, the girl below for coming on that day to support me and also, to see how it's like where Intercultural Comm will now be her subject the next sem! Thank you for being supportive though you often have transport problems, but you still came! THANK YOU, FEE VIEN!!!

Below are some shots taken with other group members who did a brilliant job too in making this event a success!

Another of our group photo with the kids. Farah is missing! Behind is our booth.

That's all for now. Take care!


This is my movie making project done for my last Movies Class under Ms. Jaime. It may or may not be the best among the best, but still...


We've worked together so efficiently that we finished it in a day! But what really amazed me was we've not only worked together as a group but also with another group. We helped each other and for instance in this video, the one and only other group helped us in shooting the video, following us wherever we go, patiently re-taking scenes again and again, and also in contributing better ideas. Thank you for your time, effort and friendship!